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Down (Main Version) - Jay Sean Ft. Lil Wayne

♥ Sunday, February 28, 2010

yours truly, ♥ZhuZhu



Loving a person is hard.
Trying not to love a person is harder
.



; {=

2:55 AM




♥ Saturday, February 20, 2010

yours truly, ♥ZhuZhu

Boo! New yr's over as we know. well not exactly since it's 15 days. But the first two main days are over. Meh. back to rotting. lol.

but aye. as much as i would really love to rot at home i cant.. cuz i've got some errands to do for onee-chan!! -__- and also. my screen hinge broke!!! what a great time it chose itself to break down huh. This means i have to make a trip down to acer, which apparently, im VERY RELUCTANT to do so. :/ thats like the last place i would ever wanna visit... (>.<)

New Year was alright i guess. Except on the first day that was a big hoo-ha because of big uncle. Sigh. it's only once a yr, why does he have to make things difficult for everyone? x.x this made grandfather so upset. Follow onee-chan and bunneh to his master's hse.. really want to do a tattoo. The triquetra. To me, its meaningful since its holds the meaning of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. And it's something i've always wanted. But again, it keeps me thinking, will i regret? That im not sure. For now, my mind's telling me 60% to get it over and done with.

Since Valentine's day was on the first day of new yr, i've got my bestest gift ever i suppose? The return of Mitch. Yeah, like 5 mins before the countdown, my heart sank like an anchor. :/

not sure if it was ever a good thing or bad thing, but it did impacted me alot. My mood went from 10 to a 0. Everyone was happily counting down at home, but yet i was there, just gazing into space. And thats how i counted down for new yr. T.T

So everyone's asking.. why did i do knowing that he has returned? .__.

I talked and yeah, i know im dumb and stupid for staying in touch with him now despite he left me with no message or anything for 4 mths. I was practically alone..

But when i saw him, all the misery jus disappeared. The only thing came into my mind was whether was he alright? The pain vanished, the hurt gone. I reflected again on myself if it was a wise decision to continue such communication with him, the fact that i went through so hard to persuade myself that he was no longer there, that he, abandoned me.

Disappointment comes into place when you know its a pit, yet u're willing to fall right into it. Oh whatever. haha. I dont know whats to come, but for now, for some reasons, i know he needs me, and i gave my promise that i will be there. Promise are not meant to be broken and i will fulfill my word.

So yepp, guess i wont be looking for a perm job till 31st March. :/ but yeah, meanwhile, if anyone has a part time job or smth, PLEASE lemme know! :3

meh. during 2nd day, 2nd uncle's hse had this REALLY CUTE JAPANESE SPITZ.. only 5 months old!! KAWAII DESU NE!!!! (>.<) i couldnt let it leave my sight at all!! Not a min!!! rawr. jus too deeply in love with dogs. lolol. but he was sooooooo adorable :3

i wish i could take him home! but then.. Junior will be jealous! ;d








Finally.. i was able to convince mom and dad to take a neoprint with us.. for once.. LOL. pretty farnie though. We have the same poses in all 4 of them!! (>.<)













till then, thats all for now.

Jaa, mata ne!

*im trying really hard to learn japanese!! GANBATTE NE!! FIGHTO! (>.<)



; {=

10:13 PM




♥ Sunday, February 7, 2010

yours truly, ♥ZhuZhu

Chinese New Year's coming. woah. time really flies. Yeah. last week of school has ended. What's left just UT 3 and im kinda considered graduated? Even though i tried hanging out with guys, but in the end, the one i still think of the most and loved the most is him. =/

Why? I thought somehow i managed to get over him, but my heart still longs for him, seeing back the chat logs we had, the things he wrote and sent to me offline, just made my tears wanting to flow out. It hurts so much...

In the years to come
Will you think about these moments that we shared
In the years to come
Are you gonna think it over
And how we lived each day with no regrets
Nothing lasts forever though we want it to
The road ahead holds different dreams for me and you

Sometimes goodbye though it hurts in your heart is the only way for destiny
Sometimes goodbye though it hurts is the only way now for you and me
Though its the hardest thing to say
I'll miss your love in every way
So say goodbye
But don't you cry
Because a true love never dies

And when you need my arms to run into
I'll come for you
Nothing will ever change the way i feel

I've missed you so much Mitch. :"(

Hmm, then again, was beezee with many on going things previously. But i guess time really does help to see people better. It is through the passage of time, that one learns to grow and mature in many ways, and it is through that, one starts to see the truth of others...

i dunno how long more before i can completely let him go, but as of now, he's still there. I've loved, cried, grieved and now what else? watashi... suki desu.

As of now, what are my plans? hmm. meh. wanted to enter Uni, but its a little rush for me now to start compiling my port folio and everything else, so i told myself that i'll give one yr to do that, but i definitely wanna further my studies. Meanwhile, most prolly i wanna get a job first! to gain working experience. Im interested to work at the bank though, it poses a challenge for me! Wanna save money!! so i can go over to Norway and the States to find my friends! haha! thats my goal i guess!

In terms of heart matters, i think imma take a break for awhile, i dun wanna be interested in anybody.. im sry even if i know your feelings, but i just cant put myself to go through the process again... i believe my heart cant take aches anymore. and it's gonna be good for me to let it rest! ;)

Rawr. The outcome for our Short Media Production was good. David was rather impressed though. And all of us were happy! Thanks guys, we all did a great job! Meanwhile.. im trying to learn Japanese as well. And gonna be taking driving license. i wanna set goals. Gonna be focused.. to know what i want and pursue it. Im determined to learn!! so i can communicate with Auntie Yuki, but again, it's tough! But nothing comes easy! xD

So yeahh the photos for our SMP group. I love it! thanks guys for the past weeks! it was a fun experience. Full of laughters and work and communication!! <3













A true love... never dies.



; {=

6:53 PM